dbminter Posted December 24, 2015 Posted December 24, 2015 It's getting harder and harder to find cynical songs I can quote each year at Christmas time. Eventually, I'll have to recycle, but I believe this is one I haven't done yet. The first thing at Christmas that's such a pain to meIs finding a Christmas treeThe second thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:Rigging up the lightsAnd finding a Christmas treeThe third thing at Christmas that's such a pain to meHangoversRigging up the lightsAnd finding a Christmas treeThe fourth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to meSending Christmas cardsHangoversRigging up the lightsAnd finding a Christmas treeThe fifth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to meFive months of bills!Sending Christmas cardsHangoversRigging up the lightsAnd finding a Christmas treeThe sixth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:Facing my in-lawsFive months of bills!I hate those Christmas cards!HangoversRigging up these lights!And finding a Christmas treeThe seventh thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:The Salvation ArmyFacing my in-lawsFive months of bills!Sending Christmas cardsOh, geez!I'm tryin' to rig up these lights!And finding a Christmas treeThe eighth thing at Christmas that such a pain to me:I wanna transformer for christmas!Charities,And what'cha mean "YOUR in-laws"! ?Five months of bills!Oh, making out these cardsHoney, get me a beer, huh?What, we have no extension cords! ?And finding a Christmas treeThe ninth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to meFinding parking spacesDaddy, I want some candy!Donations,Facing my in-laws,Five months of billsWriting out those Christmas cardsHangoversNow why the hell are they blinking! ?And finding a Christmas treeThe tenth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to meBatteries not includedNo parking spacesBuy me somethin'!Get a job you bum!Facing my in-lawsFive months of billsYo Ho, sending Christmas cardsOh geez look at this!One light goes out, they all go out!And finding a Christmas treeThe eleventh thing at Christmas that's such a pain to meStale tv specialsBatteries not includedNo parking spacesMom I gotta go to the bathroom!CharitiesShe's a witch, I hate her!Five months of billsOh, I don't even know half these people!Who's got the toilet paper?Get a flashlight I blew a fuse!And finding a Christmas treeThe twelfth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to meSinging Christmas carolsStale tv specials,Batteries not includedNo parkingWaaaaaaaaaaah!CharitiesGotta make 'em dinnerFive months of billsI'm not sending them this year, that's it!Shut up, you!Fine! You're so smart, you rig up the lights!And finding a Christmas tree
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