Here's what finally happened.
I noticed the failed verify was always on the same sector (417). A file was being burned there that I really didn't need. Just for kicks, I burned a dvd-rw leaving out 3 small files I didn't need.
It worked.
Next day, I tried making another DVD-R (max speed) using completely different files. the total size was slightly larger than the one that had been failing all the time.
It worked.
A few hours later, I wondered about those 3 files I deleted. I undeleted the original job (the one that failed so many times) which included those 3 files. Burnt to a DVD-r at max speed.
It worked!
I have NO IDEA what the hell was going with all those failures. Haven't tried reinstalling the original drive. I may try that later and tell you what happens if you care.
I ran the the DVD I just burnt throught Nero DiscSpeed. Quickscan gave a quality score of 95 on quick mode. Slow mode had quality 90, PIE 1.53, PIF 0.04.
Maybe the new drive needed to be broken in? Crazy.