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Y'all ain't gonna believe this...


Pain_Man
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Remember that show "America's Dumbest Criminals"? How 'bout "America's Dumbest Victims"? Can you believe this shit?

 

Phony doctor gives free breast exams

 

MIAMI (Reuters) - A 76-year-old man claiming to be a doctor went door-to-door in a Florida neighborhood offering free breast exams, and was charged with sexually assaulting two women who accepted the offer, police said on Thursday.

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One woman became suspicious after the man asked her to remove all her clothes and began conducting a purported genital exam without donning rubber gloves, investigators said.

 

The woman then phoned the Broward County Sheriff's Office and the suspect fled. He was arrested at another woman's apartment in the same Lauderdale Lakes neighborhood on Wednesday, a sheriff's spokesman said.

 

The white-haired suspect, Philip Winikoff, carried a black bag and claimed to be visiting on behalf of a local hospital.

 

"He told the woman that he was in the neighborhood offering free breast exams," sheriff's spokesman Hugh Graf said in a statement.

 

At least two women, both in their 30s, let him into their homes and he fondled and sexually assaulted them, the investigators said.

 

Winikoff was not a doctor, Graf said. He worked as a shuttle driver for an auto dealership.

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Winikoff

 

are you sure about the spelling of his name it couldn't be Wankoff could it :lol:

 

I have a feeling if his thing was wanking (if that means I what I believe it does :ermm: ) he wouldn't be in jail for sexual assault. :unsure:

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The women who let him in should be charged a stiff stupid tax also.

 

 

The women were in their 30s! :blink: I could understand it more if the victims were befuddled Alzheimer's patients or "developmentally disabled" (since we can't say "retarded" anymore, at least in the US, the penalty is having to watch 40 hours of Oprah straight, they taze you if you start to fall asleep, or they smack your nuts with a ballpeen hammer 3 times; hard to say which would be more painful...yeah, it'd have to Oprah, my nuts'd quit hurting in a few hours...40 hours of Oprah could cause permanent brain damage).

 

But normal, adult-type female? Just letting a strange guy fondle their cans? I spent a lot of year, nice, normal, young trying to fondle cans and got nowhere. Guess I should have made myself look sixty and pretended I was a doctor.

Edited by Pain_Man
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whatever it takes ,but usually licking my eyebrows does the trick :rasp:=))=))

 

 

With a tongue capable of that, polo, you should not have any need to pretend to be anything. What's that old joke about the guy with the foot-long tongue? :o

Edited by Pain_Man
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