Altercuno

Ok thanks - any particular make? I'll probably hold of till Jan for the sales so up to £1300 probably ok.

For that money 42" plasma - not sure about lcd at that size, the pic always looks grainy to me. The hard drives for what? Downloading new games/add ons from Sony shop? Thanks mate for info Imao2k too

Gonna get one for my son for xmas probably. Will a big external hard drive work in the usb donta? Also any recommendations for a tv to work with it under £1000? Ta muchly...

And some more... Godfather "I'll make him an offer he can't refuse." Jaws "You're gonna need a bigger boat." Some like it hot "Why would a guy wanna marry a guy?" - "Security." Dr Strangelove "Gentlemen. You can't fight in here. This is the War Room!" "If you don't get the President of the United States on that phone, do you know what's gonna happen to you?...You're gonna have to answer to the Coca-Cola Company." "Fluoridation is the most monstrously conceived and dangerous plot we have ever had to face." When Harry Met Sally " I'll have what she's having." The Silence of the Lambs "A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti." -I must hang up now Clarice. I'm having an old friend for dinner. Pulp Fiction "Mmmm-hmmm! This is a tasty burger!" The Shining "He-e-e-e-re's Johnnie!" Ghostbusters "Dogs and cats living together! Mass hysteria!" White Heat "Made it Ma! Top of the world!" Taxi Driver "You talkin' to me?" Love & Death - "He was from my village. He was the village idiot!" - "Yeah, what'd you do, place?" Die Hard "Yippie kay-yay, mother@#!%er." Casablanca "Round up the usual suspects."

Well I saw those as well, but I didn't think the boss would be too keen on having one liners popping up on his prog asking about shaggin. I didn't post Bernard Manning jokes for the same reason. Mind you, I have been wrong before as blutach pointed out... QUOTE(Altercuno @ Sep 24 2007, 10:23 PM) * Pretty sure the boss still wont go for it but it will give us something to look at... QUOTE(LIGHTNING UK! @ Sep 24 2007, 11:13 PM) * I like the idea of the newbie friendly welcome screen and have toyed with the idea in the past. I'm working on it right now. Mindreaders!!!!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA =)) =)) Regards

A few more... Shrek Lord Farquaad: I'm not the monster here, you are. You and the rest of that fairy tale trash, poisoning my perfect world. Now tell me, where are the others? Gingerbread Man: Eat me! [spits] Lord Farquaad: Some of you may die, but that is a sacrifice I am willing to make. Donkey: Don't die, Shrek. And if you see any long tunnels, stay away from the light. We all go a little mad sometimes." Norman Bates (Anthony Perkins) in Psycho "Mrs. Robinson, you're trying to seduce me." - BEN BRADDOCK (Dustin Hoffman) in The Graduate "Hey, don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone I love." - ALVY SINGER (Woody Allen) in Annie Hall "Open the pod bay doors, HAL." - DAVE BOWMAN (Keir Dullea) in 2001 "Take your stinking paws off me, you damn dirty ape." - TAYLOR (Charlton Heston) in Planet of the Apes "Because when you're a call girl, you control it, that's why. Because someone wants you...and for an hour...I'm the best actress in the world." - BREE DANIEL (Jane Fonda) in Klute "No, I'm all man. I even fought in WWII. Of course, I was wearing women's undergarments under my uniform." - ED WOOD (Johnny Depp) in Ed Wood "You hear me talkin', hillbilly boy? I ain't through with you by a damn sight. I'ma get medieval on your ass." - MARCELLUS WALLACE (Ving Rhames) in Pulp Fiction "I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries." - FRENCH SOLDIER (John Cleese) in Monty Python and the Holy Grail "He won't come after me. He won't. I can't explain it. He would consider that...rude." - CLARICE STARLING (Jodie Foster) in The Silence of the Lambs "Excuse me while I whip this out." - BART (Cleavon Little) in Blazing Saddles "Kid, the next time I say, 'Let's go someplace like Bolivia,' let's go someplace like Bolivia." - BUTCH CASSIDY (Paul Newman) in Butch Cassidy & The Sundance Kid "Bring the dog, I love animals. I'm a great cook." - ALEX FORREST (Glenn Close) in Fatal Attraction "Aristotle was not Belgian. The central message of Buddhism is not 'every man for himself.' And the London Underground is not a political movement. Those are all mistakes, Otto. I looked them up." - WANDA (Jamie Lee Curtis) in A Fish Called Wanda "Empire had the better ending. I mean, Luke gets his hand cut off, finds out Vader's his father, Han gets frozen and taken away by Boba Fett. It ends on such a down note. I mean, that's what life is, a series of down endings. All Jedi had was a bunch of Muppets." - DANTE (Brian O'Halloran) in Clerks "I'm not bad; I'm just drawn that way." - JESSICA RABBIT (Kathleen Turner) in Who Framed Roger Rabbit?

You're being silly now... Back to films… Bond Goldfinger Bond: Do you expect me to talk? Goldfinger: No Mr. Bond, I expect you to die! (After electrocuting the guy in the bathtub.) Bond: Shocking. Positively shocking. Bond: Who are you? Pussy: My name is Pussy Galore Bond: I must be dreaming Diamonds are Forever: Blofeld: The satellite is now over... Kansas. Well, if we blow up Kansas the world may not hear about it for years. Live and Let Die Bond: There seems to have been a mistake. My name is... Mr Big: Names is for tombstones, baby. Take this honky outside and waste him. The Man with the Golden Gun Bond: Who would want to put a contract out on me? M: Jealous husbands, humiliated tailors, outraged chefs. The list is endless! The Spy who Loved Me Russian Lady Agent: But James, I need you! Bond: So does England! Tomorrow Never Dies Admiral: With all due respect, M, sometimes I don't think you have the balls for this job. M: Perhaps not. The advantage is, I don't have to think with them all the time. Casino Royale Bond: Vodka Martini. Bartender: Shaken or stirred? Bond: Do I look like I give a damn? Bond: Now the whole world's gonna know that you died scratching my balls! Austin Powers Well, no offense, but if that is a woman it looks like she was beaten with an ugly stick! I think you're shagedelic baby! You're switched on! You're smashing! You're shagadelic, baby! Yeah, and I can't believe Liberace was gay. I mean, women loved him! I didn't see that one coming. Austin: Those are skin tight. How do you get into those pants baby? Felicity Shagwell: You can start by buying me a drink. Dr Evil: Mini Me, stop humping the "laser". Honest to God! Why don't you and the giant "laser" get a fricken room for God's sakes?

Soldier on... Famous Last Words Bogart, Humphrey "I should never have switched from Scotch to Martinis." Bouhours, Dominique [French grammarian] "I am about to--or I am going to--die; either expression is used." Crowley, Francis "Two Gun" (1900-1931) (American bank robber and murderer, before his execution in the electric chair) "You sons of bitches. Give my love to Mother." Olivier, Laurence (1907-1989) "This isn't Hamlet, you know, it's not meant to go into the bloody ear." (To his nurse, who spilt water over him while trying to moisten his lips.) Rodgers, James W. ( -1960) [American criminal] "Why yes, a bullet proof vest!" (On his final request before the firing squad.) Sedgwick, John (1813-1864) "Nonsense, they couldn't hit an elephant at this distance." (In response to a suggestion that he should not show himself over the parapet during the Battle of the Wilderness.) Thomas, Dylan (1914-1953) "I have just had eighteen whiskeys in a row. I do believe that is a record." Voltaire (1694-1778) "This is no time to make new enemies." (When asked on his deathbed to forswear Satan.) Wilde, Oscar (1854-1900) "Either this wallpaper goes, or I do!" George Best I used to go missing a lot...Miss Canada, Miss United Kingdom, Miss World. I spent a lot of money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest I just squandered. In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. Oliver Reed What's the point of staying sober? I do think a carpenter needs a good hammer to bang in the nail. I do not live in the world of sobriety. I have two ambitions in life: one is to drink every pub dry, the other is to sleep with every woman on earth. Some quotes from IBF might be interesting...

Dunno if these are any good for what you want...bit different from what you asked for... Albert Einstein - “Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.” Albert Einstein - “Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.” Albert Einstein - “There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.” Albert Einstein - “It is a miracle that curiosity survives formal education.” Aristotle - “Friendship is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies.” Aristotle - “Dignity does not consist in possessing honours, but in deserving them.” Aristotle - “Anyone can become angry - that is easy, but to be angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right purpose, And in the right way - that is not easy.” Aristotle - “It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.” Kung Fu-tzu Confucius - “The superior man understands what is right; the inferior man understands what will sell.” Kung Fu-tzu Confucius - “By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection which is noblest; second, by imitation, which is the easiest; And third, by experience, which is the bitterest.” Kung Fu-tzu Confucius - “To know what is right and not to do it is the worst cowardice.” Kahlil Gibran - “I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet, strange, I am ungrateful to those teachers.” Kahlil Gibran - “To understand the heart and mind of a person, look not at what he has already achieved, but at what he aspires to.” Kahlil Gibran - “You give little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.” Ralph Waldo Emerson - “A hero is no braver than an ordinary man, but he is braver five minutes longer.” Ralph Waldo Emerson - “The secret of education is respecting the pupil.” Ralph Waldo Emerson - “The revelation of thought takes men out of servitude into freedom.” Mahatma Gandhi - “First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.” Mahatma Gandhi - “If I had no sense of humour, I would long ago have committed suicide.” Mark Twain - “Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.” Mark Twain - “It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.”

Happy Birthday mate! - hope you have a good one Thanks for all the help you've given me - you're a good bloke Libra The Myth: On the one hand, Librans cannot make their minds up about anything. On the other, they are extremely decisive. Or then again, perhaps not. It all depends on how you cut the cake. The traditional expectation though, is that Librans will cut that cake into exactly equal pieces and then share it generously with their friends. Or will they? The Truth: Thankfully, Librans are not the dithering scatterbrains that some astrologers paint them as. Nor are they manically obsessed with equality. Nor, come to that, are they wishy-washy folk who can find a way to agree with anyone. They can, of course. Librans are famous for their charm. It is though, a bit of an affectation. Librans, actually, are argumentative. They love to play Devil's advocate and though like to look at situations and weigh them up, they are happy to accept an imbalance, as long as it is in their favour. On one point only are the old clichés correct. Librans do like sharing. The Key To Success: As a Libran, you are blessed with an ability to see both sides of every story. You suspect though, that you are also cursed with an inability to tell which side you prefer. Not so. When you feel unsure about something, there's always a good reason. Be less doubtful of your doubts and you'll have far more to celebrate in your future.

Feel like I'm in a time warp here...lets try something newer... Scrubs JD : What do I know about good relationships? Yesterday I had funeral sex. Dr.Cox: They hate you Bob. They hate from the bottom of your hooves to the top of your pitchfork. They hate you. By God, they hate you good. Janitor: I don't jump out and scare you. I follow you around all day. I only got about an hour and a half of work around here, and the rest of the time I track you, like an animal. Friends "You know what's weird? Donald Duck never wore pants. But whenever he's getting out of the shower, he always put a towel around his waist. I mean, what is that about?" - Chandler in The One Where No One's Ready "You really think she's hot?" "Are you kidding? If I wasn't married she'd be rejecting me right now." - Rachel and Chandler in The One With Phoebe's Rats "No, I want you to have a job that you love. Not statistical analysis and data reconfiguration." "I quit, and you learn what I do?" - Monica and Chandler in The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work Buffy the Vampire Slayer Buffy: All right. I get it, you're evil. Do we have to chat about it all day? Buffy: Vampires probably not that big on Christmas, now that I think about it. Buffy: What part of punching you in the face do you not understand? The Office - David Brent “If you treat the people around you with love and respect, they will never guess that you're trying to get them sacked.” “If at first you don't succeed, remove all evidence you ever tried.” “You have to be 100% behind someone, before you can stab them in the back.” “If work was so good, the rich would have kept more of it for themselves.” “Those of you who think you know everything are annoying to those of us who do.” “If your boss is getting you down, look at him through the prongs of a fork and imagine him in jail.” “There's no 'I' in 'team'. But then there's no 'I' in 'useless smug colleague', either. And there's four in 'platitude-quoting idiot'. Go figure.” “There may be no 'I' in team, but there's a 'ME' if you look hard enough.” “Process and Procedure are the last hiding place of people without the wit and wisdom to do their job properly.” “Accept that some days you are the pigeon, and some days you are the statue” “Know your limitations and be content with them. Too much ambition results in promotion to a job you can't do.” “Remember that age and treachery will always triumph over youth and ability.” “Never do today that which will become someone elses responsibility tomorrow.” “Quitters never win, winners never quit. But those who never win and never quit are idiots.” “If you're gonna be late, then be late and not just 2 minutes - make it an hour and enjoy your breakfast.” “The office is like an army, and I'm the field general. You're my footsoldiers and customer quality is the WAR !!!” “Statistics are like a lamp-post to a drunken man - more for leaning on than illumination.” “A problem shared is a problem halved, so is your problem really yours or just half of someone elses?” “I thought I could see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it was just some bastard with a torch, bringing me more work.” “Avoid employing unlucky people - throw half of the pile of CVs in the bin without reading them.”

MASH "Ladies and gentlemen, take my advice, pull down your pants and slide on the ice"~Sidney Freedman. Frank: I'm a pretty fair doctor myself. Ask any of my patients! Hawkeye: We can't dig people up just for that. X Files Scully: The answers are there, you just have to know where to look for them. Mulder: That's why they put the 'I' in FBI. Mulder: I tied up an air phone for three hours. I don't speak Japanese, but I think some businessman told me to stick a piece of sushi where the sun don't shine. Scully: Your contact, while interesting in the context of science fiction, was, at least in my memory, recounting a poorly veiled synopsis of an episode of Rocky and Bullwinkle. Batman & Robin TV show Alfred (dressed up as Batman): "I pray our deception succeeds, Master Robin." Robin: "Just puff out your chest and look virile, Alfred." Batman to Joker: "Shall we go into the men's locker room and put on our baggies?" Batman to Catwoman: "Don't try to pull the wool over our eye-slits."

Hitchhikers Guide, forgot about that. I was thinking Red Dwarf and... Blackadder... "My Lord, I have a cunning plan." - Baldric "I think I'll write my tombstone - Here lies Edmund Blackadder, and he's bloody annoyed." "Baldric, you wouldn't recognize a subtle plan if it painted itself purple and danced naked on a harpsichord singing subtle plans are here again." Red Dwarf... "Don't give me any of that 'Star Trek' crap. It's too early in the morning." - Dave Lister "Don't fish swim south for the winter?" "No, that's birds, sir." "Birds swim south for the winter? How do they breath?" - Cat and Kryten "Smoke me a kipper, I'll be back for breakfast." - 'Ace' Rimmer Money doesn't make you happy. I now have $50 million but I was just as happy when I had $48 million. Arnold Schwarzenegger

I read it as the title says: funny one liners/famous quotes from movies/tv shows. I have no idea how he wants to add any of this to his program. To which bit, exactly, are you referring?

Life of Brian... Brian: Excuse me. Are you the Judean People's Front? Reg: Fuck off! We're the People's Front of Judea Pontius Pilate: I have a vewy gweat fwiend in Wome called 'Biggus Dickus'. He wanks very highly. What have the Romans ever done for us? The A-Team... If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire...the A-Team. Poison Ivy, Batman 4... Slippery when wet... Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before. Mae West I always say, keep a diary and someday it'll keep you. Mae West It isn't what I do, but how I do it. It isn't what I say, but how I say it, and how I look when I do it and say it. Mae West I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt. Groucho Marx Homer... # Operator! Give me the number for 911! # Oh, so they have internet on computers now! # Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand. # Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers. # Well, it's 1 a.m. Better go home and spend some quality time with the kids. # Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene.' # Marge, don't discourage the boy! Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals! Except the weasel. # Doughnuts. Is there anything they can't do? # I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here. # Beer: The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems. Clint... You've got to ask yourself one question: "Do I feel lucky?" Well, do ya, punk? 6 Million $ Man... Gentlemen, we can rebuild him. We have the technology. We have the capability to build the world's first bionic man. Steve Austin will be that man. Better than he was before. Better, stronger, faster. I will not be pushed, filed, stamped, indexed, briefed, debriefed, or numbered! My life is my own.” --No.6; Arrival

The icons make it look like a Nero knock off. How about something more traditional? Pretty sure the boss still wont go for it but it will give us something to look at...

It looks like your home and dry - just a matter of getting it passed the boss which should be easy enough like other requests such as changing the splash logo to a pretty girl, open source and the ever popular multi session. My request would be to have the Captain Pugwash theme play on start up - I've always loved the tune and the characters - seaman stains, Roger the cabin boy et al. Here's the X-rated version, can you believe, so be warned! X-rated Captain Pugwash

Insider trading?... Its Northern Rock all over again...

OMG, its a joke post? Cripes, be posting pictures of naked ladies next... Hey volvo, talking frogs can be tricky... There was a scientist who was successful at cloning frogs, and he cloned one who could talk, but the frogs speech turned to swearing. The scientist couldn't stop the frog from swearing. He tried everything he could think of. Then one day he clacked two spoons together and the frog jumped off the table and "croaked". The FROG POLICE arrived shortly after and arrested the scientist for .... making " an obscene clone fall"

Loved the idea...clippy on Imgburn...sure the boss will go for it... If I may add - how about bringing back microsoft bob as well with all his friends? Will could explain burning - to burn or not to burn, Rover could show where the logs are buried ect...

Nero fiddles while it tries to burn...

Edit: double post...sorry about that...

Thanks spinner As Movie Junkie is clearly against it fair enough, its over...

Yeah, I thought that as well. We could carry on by email if you wish...I can pm you my addy... ...and thank you for the game

Can't see how I can stop the rook pawn. I'm starting to see what you were getting at - I could have traded N for B and kept my Rook on. Resigns, Play again?